'Self-Care': What does it mean?

First things first:

Self-care is not only bubble baths and positive vibes. Let's take that notion, write it on a piece of paper and tuck it away in our pockets. Self-care can be those things and they certainly are a huge part in taking care of yourself, but not every day will be like this during your self-care journey. 

Self-care is the moment you take to breathe. The moment you take a step back and decide this isn't good for me, and instead, you do something that is good for you. 

Physical health

Self-care might appear in the form of staying physically fit and healthy. When we're not feeling too good, often we neglect our physical self, and it can be difficult to get back on track. Remember; that's okay. Sometimes we don't have the energy, the capacity to keep ourselves healthy. We skip meals, showers, stay in bed for what seems like forever.

That's life. It's a hard dip, between sudden bursts of energy and then another few days of feeling low. Whilst it's okay to recognise that we're feeling bad, it's important to take little steps to make yourself feel better. 

With physical self-care, that can include simply washing your hair. To feel fresh, clean, renewed. Or brushing your teeth. Eating a snack. The action is just the beginning. The most important part is to take pride in the small act of looking after yourself. Feel good about it! You must celebrate the small achievements. The small steps you take to take yourself out of a bad place, to turn a bad day into a not-so bad one. 

Another great example is washing your face. Applying some moisturiser, lip balm, maybe even a little perfume. It's the small things that count. Day by day, trying something different until one day you wake up and don't think twice about having breakfast. 

Mental health

This is perhaps the most difficult part of self-care. We can maintain our physical health but what can we do about the way our mind works?

Identifying the way we feel is the first step. Am I angry? Sad? Do I need comfort, space? Sometimes the way to do this is to take a step back and remove ourselves from the situation. Feeling low can cause tunnel vision; we only see and feel whatever it is that is making us feel bad. Sometimes, we don't even know what that is.

So, take a step back. Take a breath. Remind yourself that there is more. More to the situation, more to the way you feel. Remind yourself that with lows, come highs. 

Every situation is different, every person is different. In the way we feel, the way we process our feelings, the way we react to them. There is no one answer, no particular solution to improving our mental health. Instead, we can apply self-care. We can try our best, because that's all we can ever do. 

We are told to love ourselves, to maintain a positive mindset and all will be okay. But how do we get there?

• Celebrating the small achievements can definitely help. Look how strong you are! You did something today that you couldn't do yesterday. That's something to be proud of.
• Surround yourself with people that make you feel comfortable (note: happy does not always mean comfortable. Be with people who make you feel at ease. People who don't expect anything from you, people who will allow you to just be). 
• Take some time for yourself. We often lose sight of who we are in the midst of the fog we can't get out of. We chase situations that make us feel something, without understanding that we can experience those feelings in other ways. Try a hobby that once made you feel good. Even if it doesn't anymore, at least you tried. That counts for something. 
• Push yourself to feel alive. Really, truly feel alive. This can be a bike ride in the city at night, wind in your hair and the skyline glistening around you. Go for a walk when the sun is at its peak; let its warmth soak into your skin. Remind yourself that there is an entire world outside of the one that you are consumed by. 

It's always easier said than done. But self-care is not linear. Self-care is unique to each individual person. Happiness comes with sadness, and it is important to remember that this is normal. And all we can do is try.